REVIEW: When It Rains, It Pours

This review contains spoilers for When It Rains, It Pours.

About When It Rains, It Pours

When It Rains, It Pours is a boys’ love light novel by Michi Ichiho, with illustrations by Lala Takemiya and published in English by Seven Seas Entertainment. Michi Ichiho is also the author of Yes, No, or Maybe?, which is also available from Seven Seas as a light novel and manga.

On the surface, Hagiwara Kazuaki is a regular guy who has a lot going for him. He’s popular at work, he has a lovely girlfriend, and life is good. Except underneath the surface, he’s about to explode. His girlfriend no longer has sex with him, and while he refuses to pressure her or cheat, he’s soon reaching his limit. Enter Nakarai Sei.

Sei works at the same company as Kazuaki, and the two couldn’t be less alike. Sei lives with his best friend, Kazu, who he’s not-so secretly in love with. His best friend refuses all of his advances but also wants Sei there to keep an eye on him. They’re stuck in a loop.

When Sei accidentally emails the wrong person, he has no idea that it’s Kazuaki at work. The two begin divulging their deepest, darkest secrets in anonymity, until one day they realize that they’ve been messaging each other the entire time. Now with feelings and desires in the mix, they both must choose to cross the line or walk away…

My Thoughts

If When It Rains, It Pours was a manhwa or manga, it would be all over your feed as a big toxic red flag story to avoid. Lately, a big part of the vocal BL community is against stories where anything “bad” or questionable happens. Characters can’t be imperfect, nefarious, or do bad things. I’ve spoken about this before, but I don’t subscribe to that at all. This is the type of story where no one is perfect. The character’s actions aren’t always justifiable, and sometimes they are the worst choices. But they are mostly human, even if it isn’t the kind of humanity we like to see.

Kazuaki

The story starts and focuses a lot on Kazuaki and his point of view. He is immediately not a likable character. He’s upset that his girlfriend Kaori will not have sex with him. Typical man, am I right? Except that his wanting to have sex with his girlfriend and her refusal, and how that affects him isn’t what gives me the ick about him. Sex and the frequency of it are a part of romantic relationships. It’s more than reasonable to be upset and hurt that your partner, who you see yourself sharing the rest of your life with, does not want to have sex with you. It’s normal to feel rejected and confused, especially when you did have sex with them before.

However, even before the emotional and physical affair with Sei, Kazuaki loses me because he won’t have the conversation with Kaori. He will try to initiate sex and then boom, gets rejected and bottles it up. There’s never a discussion on why she’s doesn’t want to have sex (is she asexual? is there trauma there? is she not attracted to him anymore??) Instead, he lets the resentment build up to a point of no return.

While Kazuaki’s lack of action annoyed me to no end, I do empathize with his rationale, at least a little. He feels like he loves her, they have a good life together, and doesn’t want to blow it up. He’s trying to convince himself the lack of sex isn’t a big deal. He also doesn’t want to hurt her and ruin what they have. So instead, it’s a bitter pill he swallows until he can’t take it anymore. But the lack of honesty about the sex, turns into more hiding and more burying parts of himself to a point where it’s almost as if he’s playing the role of “perfect boyfriend in love with Kaori” instead of being those thing.

None of this excuses his affair with Sei, and Kaori is right to feel hurt once the truth comes to light. Kaori isn’t at fault for Kazuaki cheating on her, regardless of her reasons for not having sex. However, both parties are responsible for the breakdown in their relationship that occurred before the cheating. Both Kaori and Kazuaki weren’t being honest with each other about their feelings. And it goes to show that the things we leave unsaid are the little cuts that lead to the bleed out.

Sei

Sei’s character is so interesting to me. Essentially, both him and Kazuaki are trapped in cages of their own making, with a wide open bars to get out. Sei is so in love with Kazu, that he’s willing to stay in that apartment, alone and unloved. It doesn’t matter that he’s getting hurt because Kazu is by his side. Because this is all Sei knows, he’s not actual aware of how much he’s missing out on.

Unfortunately for him, when he gets to know Hagiwara Kazuaki, it opens him up to how much he’s not getting. The things he’d love to get from Kazu are so easily given to him by Kazuaki: love, affection, understanding. And even when it’s wrong, it still feels infinitely better than his relationship with Kazu.

The “best friend” arc of this story is what lessened my enjoyment of this story (that and the HORRIBLE scene with Kaori’s coworker.) As much as I love mess, I could not get past it. I find it so convenient that Kazu had feelings for Sei the entire time but never acted upon those feelings. The minute he learns Sei is potentially moving on, now it’s Kazu’s turn to shine. All these years, isolating Sei from friends and love ones, essentially caging him but then also never responding to his romantic feelings. And then he forces himself on Sei. I “get” it, but I would have much rather had Kazu never like him at all, and force Sei to realize that “almost” is not good enough.

Kazuaki and Sei

Was I rooting for Kazuaki to cheat on his girlfriend? Yes, yes I was. Before the reveal that Kazauki and Sei are emailing each other, the chemistry WAS THERE!! (Could I be potentially making this up because I’m BL pilled? Sure.) But truly, in my heart of hearts, I do think that Kazauki and Sei are meant to be. And even though their less than ideal relationship circumstances pushed them together, I think they would have fallen for each other regardless.

Unfortunately, I do believe that sometimes your boyfriend/girlfriend is holding you back from meeting the true love of your life. I know we like to imagine that affair relationships should all crash and burn as payback to the person who was hurt, but sometimes the two people who end up together are the ones that were meant to be. Collateral heartbreak, be damned.

“I found someone else I love. Please break up with me.”

Even when they didn’t know each other, Kazauki and Sei’s chemistry as strangers was palpable. Then they “know” it’s each other and their connection is undeniable. They were able to bare the darkest, most pathetic, human parts of their souls to each other without judgement or shame. They were both able to recognize how much more they wanted that they weren’t getting before, and they just enjoyed being together so much. And at the end, when things do inevitably blow up, they are able to find their way back to each other.

Where to Buy When It Rains, It Pours

Thank you, Seven Seas Entertainment, for the ARC.